I am obsess of being a perfect lady who has it all.
Who has all her shit get together.
Independent, smart, thoughtful,
Firm, healthy, and fit body,
Content, mentally healthy, mindful,
Warm, loving, forgiving,
Has a good job, good salary, plenty of savings,
Skill-full on cooking, gardening, cleaning up the house,
Highly discipline, has many good friends,
Successful on her career, publish lots of papers,
and etc.
Then I started to hate my self for not being perfect, for keep making mistakes, for not being good enough, for having all of these feelings in mind because I know no one is perfect. I know, all humans have mistakes. My expectation to my self become irrational and non-realistic. I hate being too hard on my self and yet here I am struggling to withdraw from all these feelings.
I guess this is a good moment to refocus my life and my goals. What am I wanna be in the next future? What is my next big thing? What should I do with my life? Or maybe this is the time for take a break from striving for something. Maybe it is time to chill and relax.
I still don't know what to do with my life but I guess that is ok for now?
x
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